Wilford once offered me porridge
But I couldn't drum up the courage
You see, he'd spiked it with raisins,
Grass clippings and grazings
It's astounding what one old man can forage

So tell me, friend, how is your gout?
It might help if you drink from this spout
Yes, get down, drink your fill
And then take this small pill
Placebos only will work without doubt

Determined, I run for the hills
I've written now, several spare wills
If the wolves catch my cloak
Then it's dodge, jump and poke
My agile, lithe frame is what kills

The yetis of the Himalayas
Are well known gansta-type playas
With their rap songs all blazing
And roast ribs a glazing
They yell out at each other, "Oh, Heyas!"

Rabbit warren are breeding amuck
They have all four feet and all of their luck
If they cannot be bopped
Their multiplication, unstopped
Will make every last person say, "Yuck!"